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Luminosity

by stantz

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Robert Sharkey
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'Luminosity' is about an experience I had with my Grandmother, as she was nearing the end of her life. She suffered from dementia and Alzheimer’s and I had been taking care of her for several years as her condition slowly worsened. Around this time, my Mother had been diagnosed with cancer and my Father had a heart condition; for a while the importance of everything else slipped away as my siblings and I concentrated solely on looking after and supporting them. My Mother was the first to die and my Grandmother, being strictly religious, believed her daughter’s death to be a punishment from God for her own sins. This belief caused her a lot of self-imposed agony and grief, because ‘No mother should watch their children die’. Over and over she would ask me the question ‘Is my daughter dead?’ as her illness caused her brain to deteriorate. I couldn’t lie to her. As her physical condition worsened and her memories began to fade completely, I could see that her ego was dropping further and further away and there was a lightness in her eyes. One day we were in her living room, talking as normal, but I had a feeling that the heaviness of her grief and suffering had lifted for the first time in many years. At that moment I realized that all her suffering had been caused by her attachment to her ego, and that the ego wasn’t her at all, but a story she had created about herself and the world around her. I wrote ‘Luminosity’ about this moment, and the light I saw in her eyes as she appeared to transcend her human form and become pure consciousness.

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Mastering by Alex Pettman @debutmastering

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released August 9, 2020

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stantz Bristol, UK

Stantz is a solo project by David Mackenzie that ended in 2020. You can follow his latest music project David Mackenzie Composer here - linktr.ee/davidmackenzie

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